First, thank you for all your support and prayers from my last post. I really felt the power of your prayers. After offering our support and making efforts to persuade her against abortion, all unsuccessfully, we turned to her parents for help. While I stand behind my word (having promised not to tell anyone), the sanctity of life trumps my given word. I wish I could report that this went well. But, essentially she now denies being or having been pregnant (false positive she says) and I interpret this as her having gone forward with the abortion without admitting to it. Also, through all this we have learned that the number of abortions are far greater that we could have ever imagined. We are grieving. And the realities of the sin are placing wedges in relationships in the family - sibling relationships, marital relationships, and more. Please continue to pray.
In addition to all this I am still very much grieving my dad. I also find myself grieving my mother's absence in my life since she moved away after my dad died. I find it hard to concentrate at times and hard to stay organized. I feel scattered and inadequate and overwhelmed. I also find that little thoughts, little trigger give me the urge to burst into tears without notice. I'm coping, but it's hard.
Finally, I feel sandwiched between the grief of my dad dying and the stress of my upcoming transfer. I fear that a loss is more than I can take right now. I know that God will give me the strength I need and it will bring Him glory - even if I suffer a loss. I just hope I don't have to endure anymore heartache right now. I'm hopeful for a new reason to celebrate. And, even with the stress, I am excited to be starting my medication on Friday.
In addition to all this I am still very much grieving my dad. I also find myself grieving my mother's absence in my life since she moved away after my dad died. I find it hard to concentrate at times and hard to stay organized. I feel scattered and inadequate and overwhelmed. I also find that little thoughts, little trigger give me the urge to burst into tears without notice. I'm coping, but it's hard.
Finally, I feel sandwiched between the grief of my dad dying and the stress of my upcoming transfer. I fear that a loss is more than I can take right now. I know that God will give me the strength I need and it will bring Him glory - even if I suffer a loss. I just hope I don't have to endure anymore heartache right now. I'm hopeful for a new reason to celebrate. And, even with the stress, I am excited to be starting my medication on Friday.
5 comments:
Grief is a very difficult thing. I'm so sorry for the pain you feel right now. I'm hoping this transfer is the start of some much needed good news for you. Hugs!
Oh, it is so hard! Im so sorry for all this grief. And transfers are such a mix of excitement and fear. Praying for your precious little ones!
I'm still praying! Godspeed with the transfer and the meds! I know the meds themselves can be difficult.
I'm sorry to hear about your family member. That would be so difficult.
Praying for you as you cope with all these hard things. Let God carry your burdens and strengthen your faith. I know in my life, I can look back and the hardest times were also the times that my faith and relationship with the Lord grew the most.
Sorry I didn't comment earlier! I don't think I commented on the last post about your relative, either. This sounds like SUCH a hard situation to be in, loving someone (I'm sure) and yet knowing she did something you feel is wrong, wanting to help her make good choices and yet wanting to keep your word to her. I'm sorry you were stuck in that position.
It must be really hard to have your mom gone, too, when you just lost your dad. Wishing you strength and good things to come.
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