Weaning: The Final Chapter

In addition to being busy this month, we crossed a major milestone. We weaned.
In some ways it was harder than I expected and in others it went and as smoothly and naturally as others have described.

Bedtime on Thursday, October 10, 2013, was our last nursing session. [As I type this I find myself holding back tears]. Although I have been working towards weaning for some time now, I had no idea in the moment that night would be the last. Had I known, I may never have put him to bed.

So this is how it went. We’ve been slowly reducing the number of daily nursing sessions over the past few months. At his second birthday we were still nursing 3-4 times per day. By the beginning of October we were down to just mornings and bedtimes. This reduction was at my encouragement, not his disinterest. But all it took was a gentle encouragement and a little creative distraction.

Wednesday (October 9^th) a few minutes into nursing he asked to read another book. I seized the opportunity and said we could either read another book and then go straight to bed or we could go back to nursing. He picked the book and went to sleep that night without issue.

Thursday (October 10^th) in the morning he never asked to nurse. He woke up hungry so we went downstairs, got breakfast and did not nurse. That night ("the" night) he nursed for just 5-10 minutes and then went to bed.

Friday (October 11^th) we left for Disney World. I had been thinking this trip would be a perfect distraction and disruption of our routine. And if I was honest with myself, I knew he was ready. But I still wasn’t sure I was ready. Then, when I unpacked my bathroom bag Friday night, I discovered that my entire bottle of More Milk Plus (liquid herbs) had spilled in my bag - the bottle was empty. In that moment, I knew we had arrived. The whole trip we were so busy having fun that he never even once asked to nurse. We returned home on Monday (October 14^th) evening. I let Robert handle bedtime without me that night.

Since then he has asked a few times about nursing - mostly first thing in the morning, but also a few times at night. A simple "we don’t do that at night anymore" or "Mama doesn’t have any more milk" has satisfied him. Thankfully, he has shed no tears. He has been extra cuddly, but overall he has adjusted wonderfully.

I, on the other hand, have had a harder time than expected. For the first week or so I felt extremely anxious and a little depressed. These feeling have come somewhat from the emotional change in our relationship, but are actually much more of a physiological response. It’s what I imagine it would feel like going through detox. I’ve had difficulty sleeping, difficulty concentrating, felt jittery, and at times sad. It caught me off guard that my emotional reaction was so sudden and strong.

Another emotional aspect of weaning relates back to my production issues. I have a strong fear that my milk will dry up and I will be unable to provide for him - representing one more failure on the part of my body to properly mother.  And, now, I’m intentionally allowing my milk to dry up. It’s an internal struggle, but one I am working through.

So, there it is. I’m both proud and sad to say - after 2 Years, 3 Months and 1 Week - we have weaned.

Busy, Busy, Busy

This month can only be summed up as BUSY! I've worked hard (billing an extra 59.7 hours) this month alone. We've also had a lot of fun! I find time to keep up reading your blogs since I can easily do this on my phone when waiting somewhere (court, doctor, etc.), but posting is another story.

This has been such an exciting month with so many successful transfers and a few births! For those getting ready to transfer or with recent bad news, you have been in my prayers.

Now...on to some fun updates!

We spent Columbus Day weekend at Disney World. We just went for three nights. We played at Downtown Disney one day and then went to Magic Kingdom for the day. We were at the Magic Kingdom for opening and stayed through the fireworks. We had an amazing time. Leland loved all the rides. One of my favorites was the Barnstormer, which is a small rollercoaster. Leland was just tall enough to ride. We sat in the front and he loved it!  We also did a little pin trading and enjoyed some tasty food.

Other highlights this month include the homecoming football game at the college where Robert works, a fall festival in our neighborhood, a few events at Leland's school, a visit with Robert's family, a downtown art event, a birthday party for a school friend, and a church potluck.

And...in EA2 news I have some very exciting updates to share once the details have been finalized. I really can't wait to share!!!

But for now, a few pictures from our busy, fun month.

Big boy out to dinner...no booster required

Playing with Daddy

My little artist!

My Fireman

Playing with Molly

Watching the "flamingos" dancers at the downtown Art Walk

Blessed

Last week I shared our budget for our second EA (embryo adoption). Bottom line we need about $10,000. We've been saving a little each month from the small income we get from renting our old house. So far we have about $1000 or so from that.

I also have the option at work to bill (work) extra hours each month and earn quarterly bonuses. My goal for the second two quarters of this year (July - Dec) is to bill 15-20 extra hours each month which will bring in about $1500 to put towards our EA.

Yet even with these two plans in place I've been overwhelmed with the prospect of saving / raising that much money. Then last week God reminded me how powerful he is and how insignificant money is when He's in control. I stand in awe. In just 48 hours $2100 just appeared....

1. I had appealed our property value with the county tax accessor's office and was on the eve of having to go for a hearing on it. I called one last time trying to avoid the hearing and they agreed to drop the value from $111K to $79K which will result in a partial refund of our property taxes.

2. I opened the mail that evening to find a check from our mortgage company - they had recalculated our escrow account and issued us a check for the excess funds.

3. At work the next day there was an envelope with a check in it from my boss. The memo line read "bonus". When I thanked my boss (and questioned him about it) he said there was an account that he was wanting to close out so he just wrote bonus checks to clear the account.

$2100 in less than 48 hours! And we are now almost half way to our goal. God is faithful. We are blessed.

NEDC here we come...

We are on the path to embryo adoption #2. Unlike last time, we are trying to take things slowly and not stress about the process. This is much easier to do with our blessing (Leland) filling our hearts and keeping us busy.

After making the calls to Bethany Christian Services and Debbie at the National Infertility Support Center, I finally called the NEDC. I was surprised when Angie picked up as I was expecting that I might get a voicemail. Angie quickly answered my questions about cost and immediately offered to put me on the schedule for our initial consult. It was at that moment that it really sunk in - we are really doing this again! We are going to the NEDC in March for our consult!!!

After speaking with Angie I have finalized our budget for the EA. The good news was that we don’t have to pay another application fee and we are only charged the sibling fee. I had wondered about the "sibling" fee since we are not going back for a genetic sibling transfer. All things considered, our NEDC costs will be about $4500 - $5000 depending on the embryo specific costs and whether or not we need assisted hatching.
　
Since speaking with Angie, I have had my initial blood work (STD screens) completed and have my Estrace script in hand to prepare for the March consult. Our hope is to start our homestudy next month. Here is our final budget:

Home Study - $1650
Open Donation Agreement - $1750
NEDC - $5000
Medication / Ultrasounds - $1000
Travel - $650

TOTAL = $10,050

Ten thousand dollars is a little overwhelming, but stay tuned and I will share how God is already overwhelming us with His blessings.