I shared our exciting news last week, that we have matched and now have four beautiful embryos. Now, the full story.
When we decided it was time to pursue a second embryo adoption we knew we would return to the National Embryo Donation Center (NEDC) in Tennessee. We were very happy with them last time and have confidence in their views on sanctity of life. We will also receive some discounts on fees as a returning family. We will, however, be starting from square one since we had no remaining embryos from our first adoption.
The process at the NEDC is that you first get on their schedule for a mock transfer. While you are waiting for that appointment you finalize or update your home study. Then, after you are medically cleared at the mock transfer appointment, assuming your home study is complete, you go into the matching process. Transfers generally occur 2-3 months after the mock transfer appointment.
Our mock transfer is set for a March! So, how then have we already matched....?
God started writing this story back in 2010. I had my first mock transfer appointment on August 2, 2010. The appointment was awful! It hurt so badly and when it was all over Dr. Keenan said he thought I had a unicornate (deformed) uterus. He said my RE would need to do a HSG to know for sure if I did or did not have a deformed uterus. And, if my uterus was deformed as he suspected, I would be ineligible for the NEDC program.
I was crushed. We had come so far; endured so much; spent so much money on our home study, etc. to have our embryo adoption plans come to a halt. And, I knew that embryo adoption was what God was calling us to pursue. Feeling desperate and frustrated as I waited the several weeks until my HSG (it took 3 weeks to have an HSG done because of where my RE wanted me in my cycle), I looked for answers and options. It was then that I founds the site Miracles Waiting. I registered and created a profile - I felt torn as I did this, desperately wanting to continue with the NEDC, but terrified I would be ineligible. The $130 I spent to join Miracles Waiting seemed small at the time in my desperation.
Thankfully, my HSG showed that my uterus was not deformed and looked perfect. And as such, we preceded forward with the NEDC, ultimately transferring three embryos on November 16, 2010, and giving birth to Leland on July 3, 2011.
Fast-forward to the fall of 2013. We decided 2014 would be the right time to adopt embryos again. Knowing how long the wait can be we set our mock transfer appointment with the NEDC and we collected all the information needed to set a budget and to update our home study. In this season of waiting I couldn't help but peak at Miracles Waiting again. Even just peaking at, it I felt torn. A private adoption, if we could even find a donor, would be so much cheaper. But, still I really felt called to return to the NEDC. I would chastise myself for wanting to look, but I just couldn't help myself. I reasoned that I look at home listings sometimes even though I don't want to move. No harm in looking, right?
As I browsed the donor profiles, one caught my attention. They had four embryos and they hadn't used donor eggs or sperm. And....the embryos were already at the NEDC! I talked to Robert about it and we prayed about it. After a week or so I emailed them. The posting was already over six months old, so I wasn't sure it I would even get a response. Kindly they did reply - they had already choose a recipient.
Knowing it was a long shot and that we were still on track with the NEDC, I really wasn't sad or disappointed to hear that they embryos were no longer available. Yet, they still stayed on my mind. Then...out of nowhere...they emailed us. Their recipient's clinic could not handle embryos frozen 15 years ago. They asked if we were still interested. Over the next two months we emailed, exchanged photos, and talked on the phone. Then in November we verbally agreed this was a match and drafted our open donation agreement.
Then...after some delays with the holidays...we finally had the signed contract in our hand the first week of January! We have embryos!!!
We have been blessed by this unusual path to embryos in so many ways. One surprise blessing has been getting to know our donors so early in the process. We have an open relationship with Leland's genetic family, but our contact has been very minimal. Getting to know our donors now feels like a better foundation for a stronger relationship going forward. And, as a result it has spurred my desire to know Leland's genetic family more and we have had a lot more contact with them recently as well.
When we decided it was time to pursue a second embryo adoption we knew we would return to the National Embryo Donation Center (NEDC) in Tennessee. We were very happy with them last time and have confidence in their views on sanctity of life. We will also receive some discounts on fees as a returning family. We will, however, be starting from square one since we had no remaining embryos from our first adoption.
The process at the NEDC is that you first get on their schedule for a mock transfer. While you are waiting for that appointment you finalize or update your home study. Then, after you are medically cleared at the mock transfer appointment, assuming your home study is complete, you go into the matching process. Transfers generally occur 2-3 months after the mock transfer appointment.
Our mock transfer is set for a March! So, how then have we already matched....?
God started writing this story back in 2010. I had my first mock transfer appointment on August 2, 2010. The appointment was awful! It hurt so badly and when it was all over Dr. Keenan said he thought I had a unicornate (deformed) uterus. He said my RE would need to do a HSG to know for sure if I did or did not have a deformed uterus. And, if my uterus was deformed as he suspected, I would be ineligible for the NEDC program.
I was crushed. We had come so far; endured so much; spent so much money on our home study, etc. to have our embryo adoption plans come to a halt. And, I knew that embryo adoption was what God was calling us to pursue. Feeling desperate and frustrated as I waited the several weeks until my HSG (it took 3 weeks to have an HSG done because of where my RE wanted me in my cycle), I looked for answers and options. It was then that I founds the site Miracles Waiting. I registered and created a profile - I felt torn as I did this, desperately wanting to continue with the NEDC, but terrified I would be ineligible. The $130 I spent to join Miracles Waiting seemed small at the time in my desperation.
Thankfully, my HSG showed that my uterus was not deformed and looked perfect. And as such, we preceded forward with the NEDC, ultimately transferring three embryos on November 16, 2010, and giving birth to Leland on July 3, 2011.
Fast-forward to the fall of 2013. We decided 2014 would be the right time to adopt embryos again. Knowing how long the wait can be we set our mock transfer appointment with the NEDC and we collected all the information needed to set a budget and to update our home study. In this season of waiting I couldn't help but peak at Miracles Waiting again. Even just peaking at, it I felt torn. A private adoption, if we could even find a donor, would be so much cheaper. But, still I really felt called to return to the NEDC. I would chastise myself for wanting to look, but I just couldn't help myself. I reasoned that I look at home listings sometimes even though I don't want to move. No harm in looking, right?
As I browsed the donor profiles, one caught my attention. They had four embryos and they hadn't used donor eggs or sperm. And....the embryos were already at the NEDC! I talked to Robert about it and we prayed about it. After a week or so I emailed them. The posting was already over six months old, so I wasn't sure it I would even get a response. Kindly they did reply - they had already choose a recipient.
Knowing it was a long shot and that we were still on track with the NEDC, I really wasn't sad or disappointed to hear that they embryos were no longer available. Yet, they still stayed on my mind. Then...out of nowhere...they emailed us. Their recipient's clinic could not handle embryos frozen 15 years ago. They asked if we were still interested. Over the next two months we emailed, exchanged photos, and talked on the phone. Then in November we verbally agreed this was a match and drafted our open donation agreement.
Then...after some delays with the holidays...we finally had the signed contract in our hand the first week of January! We have embryos!!!
We have been blessed by this unusual path to embryos in so many ways. One surprise blessing has been getting to know our donors so early in the process. We have an open relationship with Leland's genetic family, but our contact has been very minimal. Getting to know our donors now feels like a better foundation for a stronger relationship going forward. And, as a result it has spurred my desire to know Leland's genetic family more and we have had a lot more contact with them recently as well.
5 comments:
That's amazing! 15 year old is how old our embies are! That is such an awesome story :)
Very cool! :)
That is amazing how it all worked out. So great that you saved money and have been able to have a relationship with them.
What a great story! That's so cool!
Wow! So exciting! We gave embryo adoption a shot a little over a year ago but weren't matched. So fun to read all of this! So glad it's working out so well for you.
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