Disclosure

We want to actively share Leland’s story with him. We never want him to experience a big reveal that he was adopted as an embryo. We want his story to simply be something he has always known, with deeper understanding as he grows. This is easier said than done.

I think all parents must struggle with the big question of "where do babies come from?" This is a natural question I believe all children will ask at varying ages. Thus, most parents probably wait until their child brings it up to ever discuss the child’s origin and path to joining the family.

We, however, want to take a pro-active approach to the "where did I come from" question in order to lay the foundation and in order to (hopefully) prevent Leland from ever feeling like it was a secret how he was conceived. To do this I want to write him a "when I came from" book. In the book I want the book to tell specific information about our donors, our doctors, and our trip to Tennessee to "meet" him.

The problem is....I’m having trouble finding the words. I don’t quite know how to frame things or the specific words I want to use. Do I call our donors "genetic parents" or "donors" or "friends" or just by their names? Do I actually use the word "adopted"? Do I use the word "embryo" or "snowflake" or "special gift"? Every choice seems to carry with it a multitude of implications.

Lost on how to begin I have decided begin the dialog with Leland using books others have written. I have started collecting children’s books related to where do babies come from, building of non-traditional families, embryo donation, and egg donation. My hope is that I will find several of these that I like and that "fit" and that I can use the language from those books to write our own book with the specific information added into the story.

So that’s the plan.

If anyone has any suggestions in general or suggestions for books to read I welcome all the help I can get.

And, finally, I hope to post some book review here to pass along what I find.